7 Practical Steps to Improve Self-Esteem and Become More Self-Confident


To live a happy life, fulfill your dreams, and maintain harmonious relationships, adequate, healthy self-esteem is required. Without it, it’s impossible to truly enjoy the present moment, achieve professional fulfillment, and build a strong, inspiring environment. How to boost a woman’s self-esteem? Here you’ll find the answer to your question.

Causes of Low Self-Esteem

Our self-esteem begins to form in childhood, heavily influenced by the closest people to us—usually our parents or caretakers, which can sometimes be a grandparent.

  • If parents respect the child, value them as an individual, support their interests and passions, provide emotional support during challenging times, and praise their achievements, the child is likely to develop healthy self-esteem.
  • If a young girl is constantly told that she is “better than everyone else,” or is “a queen,” and her whims are indulged, she will probably have inflated self-esteem. Such a woman is likely to be intolerant of criticism, get easily offended, and constantly seek attention.
  • If adults compare their child unfavorably to other children, criticize them constantly, give unsolicited advice, punish them harshly for mistakes, and manipulate them through guilt, that person will likely suffer from low self-esteem.
  • During adolescence, a period when teenagers are extremely sensitive to criticism, self-esteem can continue to decline. This is exacerbated by the influence of peers and friends.
  • In adulthood, relationships, personal achievements, and our general outlook on life can either positively or negatively affect self-esteem. Today’s social media landscape doesn’t help either. We see so many successful people who appear to have found their life’s calling, achieving remarkable results rapidly. They manage to juggle business, social, and media lives while maintaining a healthy lifestyle and being active in sports. They are parents, travelers, and writers all rolled into one.
  • However, it’s important to remember that social media only shows us what people want us to see. Behind the scenes, it’s not always as perfect as it appears. People work hard for years to achieve their goals, continually learning and making mistakes along the way.

    Nevertheless, it’s easy for our self-esteem to keep sliding down when we’re acutely aware of our own failures but not those of others. The good news is that low self-esteem is not irreversible; it can be improved.

Signs of Low Self-Esteem

  • You can’t handle criticism; it hurts you deeply. Any critique aimed your way feels like a personal attack.
  • You constantly procrastinate on important and challenging tasks. Fear of failure, criticism, and stress paralyzes you.
  • You unfavorably compare yourself to others.
  • You’re overly concerned about what others think of you.
  • You feel sorry for yourself.
  • You aim to please everyone and seek their approval, to the point that you can’t say “no” to anyone. You frequently apologize, try to make everyone happy, and often seek validation from others.
  • You don’t command respect from others, largely because you don’t respect yourself.
  • You doubt your own worth, feeling that you need to earn a better life or deserve good treatment.
  • You’re unhappy with your appearance and downplay your achievements.
  • You’re hesitant to form new relationships or connections. You’re afraid to show your true self and often hide behind a facade.
  • You often feel guilty for no apparent reason.
  • You have a pessimistic outlook on life.
  • Your body language is closed off; you often slouch.

Until your self-esteem improves, it will be difficult to achieve significant accomplishments, build harmonious relationships, or attain financial freedom.

If you recognize any of these signs in yourself, congratulations! You’re now aware of areas you can start working on.

7 Practices to Boost Your Self-Esteem

Digital Detox

Temporarily disconnect from social media and any influences that lower your self-esteem. Once you’ve regained balance, you can return to your normal routine—although you may not want to. Periodically engage in these digital detoxes and only keep subscriptions to people who genuinely inspire you.

Positive Affirmations: “I did great!”

Start a journal or notepad (choose one that you really like) and every evening, jot down at least 10 things you can commend yourself for.

Look at each point and tell yourself: “I’m smart!” These can be simple achievements like cooking a delicious meal or applying beautiful makeup. Make sure to compliment yourself and feel proud of your actions.

Initially, you might find it challenging to genuinely feel the compliment, but with time, it will become easier. The key is to make this a long-term practice.

Gradually, your list will feature more significant accomplishments, which will likely improve other areas of your life as well.

Don’t just praise yourself for useful tasks; include things that brought you pleasure. This is especially helpful for those who often force themselves to do things “for the future” that they don’t enjoy, such as sticking to a job they dislike.

“I Deserve Better”

Start doing everything you can for yourself and allow yourself more freedom.

Choose only the best for you from what’s available: food, clothing, beauty products, and vacations.

Eat healthy food — it’s worth taking the time to find quality ingredients, learn the right recipes, and master cooking techniques.

Don’t clutter your life with excess possessions that end up taking space in your closet. Instead, curate a stylish capsule wardrobe and invest in high-quality items, even if you have fewer of them.

Plan fulfilling weekends, pamper yourself with spa nights, and take walks.

The key is to really allow yourself to relax and recharge. If you frequently engage in activities you love, you’ll find less need for extended breaks.

Self-Care Routine

Aim to look good, not for anyone else, but to bring joy to yourself. Take care of your body and appearance.

When you’re struggling with low self-esteem, it’s often hard to want to spend time on self-care. Even if you’re not in the mood, push through and do what you can—whether that means putting on makeup, keeping up with hair removal, dressing nicely, trying a new hairstyle, working with a personal trainer, or even getting a relaxing massage.

This really works! Your mood will improve, and your self-esteem will rise, yet we often overlook this simple step.

Maintain a good Posture

Straighten your back. You’ll be surprised at how quickly your mood and self-confidence improve!

A slouched back doesn’t just affect your mood; it also affects your appearance: it can lead to a double chin and facial puffiness due to lymphatic stagnation (and it’s also really bad for your internal organs).

Also, the more closed-off and constricted your body language is, the less confident you’ll feel.

Personal Boundaries

Stop berating yourself and calling yourself derogatory names, even jokingly, and don’t let others do it either. From now on, praise yourself for any task you’ve accomplished.

Give yourself compliments and learn to accept them from others. Take time to look at yourself in the mirror, appreciate your own beauty, and admit your love for yourself.

And cut off toxic relationships. Minimize your interactions with such people as much as possible. Instead, start building an environment of individuals who inspire and support you.

For Those Who Want Quick and Quality Results

Consider seeing a psychologist or a transformational coach.

A professional can help improve your self-esteem in just a few sessions, identify the root causes of your issues, and help you address them.

This seventh practice yields the quickest results.

Now you know how to boost your self-esteem. But knowledge without action won’t get you far. These practices are easy and enjoyable; use them regularly. Start with the ones that appeal to you the most and then incorporate all of them.

When a woman has healthy self-esteem and unwavering self-love, not only does she begin to live the life of her dreams, but she also inspires everyone around her to do the same. So the benefits of this are as great for those around you as they are for you.

Images: @mathildegoehler



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